Interpreting Tarot -- Reading the Book of Life
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Rebecca Brents

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Way Of Four Spellbook: Working Magic with the Elements
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	The Number One Complaint After the Family Get-Together Part 2 by Susan Dunn Momentum Coaching
Astrology, Tarot, and Self Improvement for the New Age.

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The Number One Complaint After the Family Get-Together
Part 2
by Susan Dunn

Page: 1 2 3

The same things likely occur -- someone is late, someone has on the white gloves, someone tells you how to raise your kids, someone drinks too much and becomes moderately offensive -- but our emotional investment is not the same. We take it more in-stride because we are't responsible for these people.

In order to survive the big family get-togethers you have to get the same mindset. That is, if you want to enjoy yourself.

Expectations

When you think about it, it's our expectations that make us happy or unhappy. If you've prepared for a family get-together that you expect to be a disaster, you know the reactions that occur. Your body tenses up, you might get a headache or stomachache, or you start giving your partner a litany of what's going to happen and how awful it's going to be.

You start catastrophizing! You're setting yourself up to have an awful time, because you expect to. Also because you're becoming rigid, you lose the ability to cope.

Or, alternately, you're telling yourself this time it's going to be different and you're going to have a perfect get-together. Either extreme isn't helpful. The negative one will become a self-fulfilling prophecy, and the latter isn't likely to occur.

Perfectionism is an expectation that is guaranteed to cause distress. If the event turns out to be enjoyable, and/or you manage to enjoy yourself, be happily surprised. Keep your expectations limited, and plan to enjoy yourself. That's the only thing under your control.

Avoid the use of "never" and "always." They are not helpful, nor are they often true, unless you say to yourself "I always have a bad time," or "I never have a good time," in which case you will make sure this happens!

Emotional Intelligence

All the Emotional Intelligence competencies come into play. Some of the more pertinent ones are: Intentionality, Optimism, Flexibility, Creativity, and Resilience.

Intentionality means having an intent to what you do, what you say and how you act. Before you go, ask yourself some hard questions -- and answer them to yourself, the person who matters.

Do you intend to have a bad time? Do you intend to get your feelings hurt? Do you intend to lock horns with Uncle Teddy? Do you intend to insult your brother? Do you intend to pick a fight with someone?

Page: 1 2 3

Susan Dunn, MA, Clinical Psychology, The EQ CoachT, Susan Dunn, MA, cEQc, The EQ Coach™, Susan Dunn. Bringing the power of Emotional Intelligence to YOUR life through coaching, eBooks, and distance learning. Midlife, retirement and transition coaching, career and relationships. Email for free EQ ezine. Want to be a certified EQ Coach? Email for information on this fast, affordable, comprehensive, no-residency program. Products available for licensing to build your practice. Visit the best ebook library on the Internet - EBook Library.

Most of the arguments to which I am a party fall somewhat short of being impressive, owing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about.
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Born September 15, 1889

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Enchanted Spirit is a non-denominational spiritual center of healing, support, self-improvement, personal guidance, education and writing. We publish multi-media works of New Age thought and information to encourage serenity and growth in individual life choices, advance the universal search for life's meaning, and promote tolerance for positive ideas from all philosophies and religious traditions, believing as we do that truth is where you find it.

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Last updated August 30th, 2004

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Astrology is for Believers.

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Tarot of the Spirit Deck
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