Interpreting Tarot -- Reading the Book of Life
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Rebecca Brents

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Awakening Intuition: Using Your Mind-Body Network for Insight and Healing
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Mona Lisa Schulz, Christiane Northrup

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	Raising Emotionally Intelligent Sons Part 1 by Mark Brandenburg, MA, CPCC Mark Brandenburg
Astrology, Tarot, and Self Improvement for the New Age.

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Raising Emotionally Intelligent Sons
Part 1
by Mark Brandenburg, MA, CPCC

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Page: 1 2

"Mommy, I fell down," said the 5-year-old to his mother during a recent soccer practice. "Were you tough?" asked his mom. "Yeah," he said and walked away with his head down.

I was at this soccer practice with my daughter, and feeling just a bit out of place as the only dad there. When I heard this exchange, it reminded me of the ways we can blindly follow the "old school" concerning how we raise boys.

The old school says that boys should be tough, independent and reject feelings of being weak or fearful. When I heard this mother ask her son if he was tough, I wanted to say, " All he wants is for you to ask if he's OK!"

What does raising "tough and independent" boys create?

Men generally haven't received the training in "emotional intelligence" that women have. They have a harder time identifying their own feelings, as well as the feelings of others. They have been trained from an early age to learn that being tough is more important than showing feelings.

When you employ the old school of raising tough and independent boys, you damage boys' ability to feel closely connected to others and their ability to have awareness of their own feelings. Boys learn to "swallow" feelings of inadequacy or weakness.

The problem with swallowing these feelings is that it impacts ones' ability to access other feelings as well. Emotionally intelligent people have access to all of their feelings, not just the ones that are pleasant for them.

The result of swallowing these feelings may be fathers and men who are "successful" (they make a lot of money), but who are not in touch with their own feelings and have difficulty in nurturing themselves or their children. They tend to have tremendous difficulty in developing successful relationships with their loved ones.

Most of the men walking around today report they either don't remember being hugged by their fathers and/or they have never heard their father say "I love you" to them. It's easy to see why men often struggle in this area. Falling into the trap of the old school for boys is easy because it's been the standard for fathers for a very long time.

It is entirely normal and natural for fathers to have conflicting thoughts about this subject. There will probably be a part of you that wants your son to be tough enough to handle a tough, competitive world.

There may be another part of you that doesn't want your son to divorce three wives--each of whom he blames for the failed marriage-and who buys a red sports car and hangs out at singles bars when he reaches age 50.

Page: 1 2

Mark Brandenburg MA, CPCC, coaches parents by phone to balance their life and improve their family relationships.

He is an Instructor for the Academy for Coaching Parents, and author of "Secrets of Emotionally Intelligent Fathers" Ecourse.

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Life is like a cobweb, not an organization chart.
~ H. Ross Perot ~
Born June 27, 1930

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Enchanted Spirit is a non-denominational spiritual center of healing, support, self-improvement, personal guidance, education and writing. We publish multi-media works of New Age thought and information to encourage serenity and growth in individual life choices, advance the universal search for life's meaning, and promote tolerance for positive ideas from all philosophies and religious traditions, believing as we do that truth is where you find it.

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Last updated October 12th, 2004

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Astrology is for Believers.

With an open mind and a knowledge of Astrology you can watch your life unfold in ways that make sense.

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Sometimes getting the right answer means asking the right question.

Life is full of hints, signs, and advice ... if you know where to look and what you're looking for.

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A Weekend to Change Your Life: Find Your Authentic Self After a Lifetime of Being All Things to All People
By
Joan Anderson