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Learn from the World's Second Richest Man
by Susan Dunn

Warren Buffet is the world's second richest man (behind Bill Gates). Unlike Gates though, "the Oracle of Omaha" as he is called, earned all his money by investing.

Considering that marriage is one of the biggest investments you will make in your life, let's see what Mr. Buffet can teach us.

1. Keep a cool head.

Counter-intuitively, the stock market, long bastion of male supremacy, is one of the most emotional things in the world. As is love. Ditto for lust. Buffett has said an investor doesn't have to be a genius to succeed, he or she just has to avoid the big mistakes. As in love, i.e., there are choices you can make that would be a big mistake (such as marrying an active drug abuser). Avoid these.

2. Only invest in what you understand.

Avoiding the NASDAQ fiasco because he couldn't understand it, Buffett recommends investing in solid companies you understand, and patronize yourself. One of his investments is Dairy Queen. He dines there, and has held interviews there.

I think we could translate this into marry a good solid person who's honest and transparent, and whose values are understandable. Bypass the "hottie" or "gigolo" who's all glitz and glamour, volatile and unpredictable.

And ... big AND ... understand marriage and what it entails, or don't invest in it.

3. "You are neither right nor wrong because the crowd disagrees with you. You are right because your data and reasoning are right [and you manage your emotions]." ~ Warren Buffett

Do the homework and then marry the person who's right for you. Ignore the opinions of others. Conduct your marriage the way that's "right" to you, not others.

4. Don't buy low and sell high. Buy and hold.

Buffett is notorious for the long hold. He's never sold a share of Berkshire-Hathaway, the king pin, and he's never split the stock.

So ... choose a good candidate you plan to stick with. Don't get into day-trading in the marriage arena, and don't go splitting your stock. Stick with your original investment as long as it's good, and reap the rewards. Choose the best. Don't worry about the rest.

5. Buffett's Investment Rule Number One: Don't Lose Money. Buffett's Investment Rule Number Two: Don't forget Rule Number One.

Marriage Rule Number One: Don't Marry a Loser.
Marriage Rule Number Two: Don't Forget Rule Number One.

6. "Investing is like batting a baseball except that you get as many pitches as you want and you never have to swing. Wait for the 'home run ball' before investing." ~ Warren Buffett

If you have your act together as an adult individual with good emotional intelligence, you don't have to marry anyong. With no sense of urgency, you can afford to look 'em over carefully, and wait for the home run ball.

7. "The ability to say 'no' is a tremendous advantage to an investor. Most investment ideas should be said 'no' to." ~ Warren Bufferr

As should most scenarios in the dating scene, and all scenarios in the extra-marital scene. And what does it take to be able to "just say no"? Being centered. Having emotional intelligence. Being able to avoid momentary temptations (like the NASDAQ back when) and sticking with your original plan for long-term gain. Knowing exactly what you're looking for. Getting the facts and trusting your intuition.

Corollary: "As far as you are concerned, the stock market does not exist. Ignore it." ~ Warren Buffett Once you have chosen the stock, you are no longer in the stock market. Ignore it.

Once you have married, you are no longer in the dating market. Ignore it.

8. Buffett says he's "disgusted" by corporate bosses who tout their companies while selling their shares. "These business leaders view shareholders as patsies," he says, "not partners."

Your marriage partner is a shareholder in your joint investment. Don't treat him or her like a patsie by appearing to be committed and then selling shares on the sly.. and you know what I'm talking about. Anything that cheats the relationship. Anything.

As Buffett says, "wide diversification is only required when investors do not understand what they're doing." Capisce?

9. "Lethargy, bordering on sloth should remain the cornerstone of an investment style," says Buffett. "Most success can be attributed to inactivity. Most investors cannot resist the temptation to constantly buy and sell." There's that word again ... "temptation." And what's the divorce rate now? (50%) And the divorce rate for second marriages? (even higher)

10. "Unless you can watch your stock holding decline by 50% without becoming panic-stricken, you should not be in the stock market."

Marriage-wise, you have to be able to ride the roller coaster without panicking. It's "for better and for worse," remember? You have to be able to get through the really difficult times without panicking.

On the other hand, you have to know when it's time to get out. "'Turn-arounds' rarely turn around, says Buffett and certain marriages won't work and can't be saved and it would be toxic to remain in them.

Susan Dunn, MA, Clinical Psychology, The EQ CoachT, Susan Dunn, MA, cEQc, The EQ Coach™, Susan Dunn. Bringing the power of Emotional Intelligence to YOUR life through coaching, eBooks, and distance learning. Midlife, retirement and transition coaching, career and relationships. Email for free EQ ezine. Want to be a certified EQ Coach? Email for information on this fast, affordable, comprehensive, no-residency program. Products available for licensing to build your practice. Visit the best ebook library on the Internet - EBook Library.

The four cornerstones of character on which the structure of this nation was built are: Initiative, Imagination, Individuality and Independence.
~ Edward Rickenbacker ~
Born October 8, 1890

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Last updated September 22nd, 2004

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Answering Creativity's Call
By
Rebecca Brents

Astrology is for Believers.

With an open mind and a knowledge of Astrology you can watch your life unfold in ways that make sense.

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The Queen of My Self: Stepping Into Sovereignty in Midlife
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