Interpreting Tarot -- Reading the Book of Life
By
Rebecca Brents

Astrology Coaching
Live Your Life by Divine Design

Learn in detail about your character, the way you were built to operate, the life you were meant to live, how you were designed to support yourself with money, in relationships, and with work that honors the unique spirit you are.

Is This Your Year of Living Prosperously?

Take a journey through your birth chart as never before.

Real Astrology ...
for people who take
their lives seriously.

Enroll in
Astrology Coaching
TODAY!!

Sometimes getting the right answer means asking the right question.

Life is full of hints, signs, and advice ... if you know where to look and what you're looking for.

Astrology and Tarot are tools that blend free will and useful information into new dimensions of thought ... so you can discover your best options. But the choice to act is always yours.

Work with all your possibilities.

Join our
Astrology and Tarot
Premium Membership
TODAY!!

Personal Notes: How to Write from the Heart for Any Occasion
By
Sandra E. Lamb

Our Premium Members get

Readings ~ Classes

Lectures ~ Articles

Ezines ~ Oracles

And More!!

For people who take
their lives seriously.

Join our
Premium Membership
TODAY!!

	How to Manage a Transition Successfully by Susan Dunn Momentum Coaching
Astrology, Tarot, and Self Improvement for the New Age.

    Email This Page to a Friend    

How to Manage a Transition Successfully
by Susan Dunn

I work with clients in transition. Some of the transitions are chosen, such as retirement. Others are involuntary transitions such as losing a job or being forced to change careers because of a disability.

We all have a different "set point" for our ability to handle changes. It has to do with our natural temperaments, and also the way change and ambiguity were handled when we were children. Why "ambiguity?" Because more than anything else, transitions involve the unknown. We can't know for sure what lies ahead, and there is always ambivalence. Every transition involves saying "good bye" to something, being unsure, and then saying "hello" to something else.

Not knowing what lies ahead, and not being sure we can handle it leads to fear, and what do we know about fear? It causes us to shut down.

Think of an extreme example -- if you were walking in the woods and were suddenly confronted with a bear. Our brains are first and foremost designed to help us self-preserve, so immediately it floods chemicals into our system that put us on "fight of flight" status, full alert. This is designed to stop us from thinking. It's a "down and dirty" sort of mechanism, because when confronted with actual danger, there isn't much we need to "know" except to get away, and if we stop to think, we won't move fast enough.

When this mechanism sets in a situation such as a transition, where the danger is not imminent but can feel that way, you can see problems arise.

THE TOOLS YOU NEED TO HANDLE A TRANSITION

1. A cool head. You need to be able to gather information and think clearly.

2. Intuition. To access your inner wisdom. In a state of turmoil, you circumvent this completely.

3. An expert opinion. A source of support. Someone you can rely on to help you stay centered and focused, and who has expertise to give you.

WHAT TO AVOID

One thing I notice in clients in transition is that they lose their center. The turmoil throws them out of touch with their inner wisdom and they start thrashing around for advice. Often they're aware that they're behaving irrationally, or that they're locked in analysis-paralysis, unable to act at all.

In certain circumstances expert advice is needed -- a lawyer, a real estate agent, a divorce therapist or an engineer. However what usually happens is because they've lost trust in themselves, they don't trust anyone else either, so they start putting themselves into what I call "the battle of the experts." One opinion won't do; they seek another, and yet another. You also tend to get a lot of unsolicited advice, too, from friends and relatives. This simply adds to the confusion.

WHAT TO DO

As I teach in my Internet course on Transitions, I suggest doing two things if you feel yourself in this position. One is to hire a coach -- an objective outside party who can give perspective, as well as support, guidance and resources. The other thing is to take a course such as the Transitions course, so you can gain perspective on your own situation.

There are certain things common to every Transition, and this won't be your first one or your last. If you can GROW through one, instead of just GOING through one, you will have increased your life skills tremendously and be better prepared when the next one comes along. You'll come out with more self-confidence instead of feeling helpless.

It's also a good time to work on your emotional intelligence competencies -- flexibility, resilience, social support network, intuition. The more relaxed and flexible you can become, the better you'll be able to generate options and solutions and avoid the "shut down" mode.

THE WISDOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE

Some crises require immediate action. Others will work themselves out with time and you don't really need to do anything. You develop your ability to sense this better with experience, and part of it is intuition.

For instance I used to give events in my previous profession as a fund raiser, and there's a point in every event where it seems to all fall apart. It comes back together, if you ride the roller coaster for a while, but only experience can give you that knowledge. Once you learn to expect the fall-apart time, not be surprised by it, the anxiety goes away.

THE IRONY

The irony is that the more stable and well-managed your life has been, the more a major transition can throw you. If you've been organized, or simply lucky, it may have been years since you felt the world shift beneath your feet.

For some people this comes at retirement, and it can be an extremely stressful time. I think of my client Fred, who was a successful Wall Street broker for 35 years and now is retired. Same occupation, same office for all that time. He says, "I don't know how to do anything." He means he hasn't figured out yet how to live without going to the office every day. For 30 years his life was organized in a certain way. He looked forward to the day he could retire and get away from the downside, and now that it's here, he finds himself lost without the imposed structure. He feels like it's a dead end, when actually he's in a transition between "that" and whatever lies ahead, which is his to create. Because of the former stability in his life, he hasn't had experience crafting his life in 35 years. It's brought on emotions he hasn't felt in years.

CONTINUAL LEARNING PROCESS

Research has shown that the life trajectory of people who die in their 5th or 6th decade is school, then work, then leisure. Resilient seniors are those who have combined all three throughout their lifetime. Learning is a key. Learn about transitions now, so when the next one comes along, and it will, you'll be that much farther ahead of the game.

Susan Dunn, MA, Clinical Psychology, The EQ CoachT, Susan Dunn, MA, cEQc, The EQ Coach™, Susan Dunn. Bringing the power of Emotional Intelligence to YOUR life through coaching, eBooks, and distance learning. Midlife, retirement and transition coaching, career and relationships. Email for free EQ ezine. Want to be a certified EQ Coach? Email for information on this fast, affordable, comprehensive, no-residency program. Products available for licensing to build your practice. Visit the best ebook library on the Internet - EBook Library.

Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he's supposed to be doing at the moment.
~ Robert Benchley ~
Born September 15, 1889

Please click on the titles to visit these fine areas of Enchanted Spirit

---

	PO Box 1080 Sandia Park · NM · 87047

Enchanted Spirit is a non-denominational spiritual center of healing, support, self-improvement, personal guidance, education and writing. We publish multi-media works of New Age thought and information to encourage serenity and growth in individual life choices, advance the universal search for life's meaning, and promote tolerance for positive ideas from all philosophies and religious traditions, believing as we do that truth is where you find it.

---

This site is hosted and maintained for Enchanted Spirit by

Catweasel Ink

Copyright © 1999 - 2008 by Enchanted Spirit and Catweasel Ink.
Contributed works copyright by their respective authors. All rights reserved.
Unauthorized reproduction specifically prohibited.

Last updated April 1st, 2004

Rebecca is not available
right now.


Please check back
later
CLICK HERE FOR
MORE INFO

Astrology is for Believers.

With an open mind and a knowledge of Astrology you can watch your life unfold in ways that make sense.

You can recognize the subtle knock of real opportunity and the soft voice of invitations to personal growth because you know they're coming, where to look for them, and what they'll look like when they appear.

Real Astrology ...
for people who take
their lives seriously.

Join our
Astrology and Tarot
Premium Membership
TODAY!!

Astrology is for Believers.

With an open mind and a knowledge of Astrology you can watch your life unfold in ways that make sense.

You can understand the demands of change and "what's really going on" in a crisis.

Whether in a gentle push in the right direction or in a "hard knock upside the head," you can read the message behind what life is asking of you.

Real Astrology ...
for people who take
their lives seriously.

Join our
Astrology and Tarot
Premium Membership
TODAY!!

Toxic In-Laws: Loving Strategies for Protecting Your Marriage
By
Susan Forward