The Circle of Life -- The Zodiac Signs and the New Moon's Journey
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Rebecca Brents

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Rituals of Healing : Using Imagery for Health and Wellness
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Jeanne Achterberg and Barbara Dossey

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	Libra Astrology Self Improvement for Libra Surviving and Thriving Through Divorce by Peggy Neill
Astrology, Tarot, and Self Improvement for the New Age.

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Surviving and Thriving Through Divorce
by Peggy Neill

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1. Practice extreme self-care.

Be aware of your emotional, spiritual, and physical needs, and build in ways to meet them. Identify and practice at least five daily habits that are self-nurturing and healing. If you have difficulty taking good care of yourself, take good care of your children's parent.

2. Reach out.

Be careful not to isolate yourself. Use the support systems available to you, whether through counseling, Beginning Experience groups, Codependents Anonymous, your church, your family, or your circle of close friends. It is a gift to others to let them know how they can best support you.

3. Communicate honestly and appropriately with your children about the divorce.

This does not mean burdening them with adult information or full emotional disclosure. It does mean letting them know that you, too, are experiencing sadness and loss, and that it is a perfectly natural part of the transition you are going through as a family.

Let them know, to the best of your ability, what to expect in the way of changes in schedules, schools, childcare, and living arrangements, and what they can count on remaining the same.

4. Allow time and space for grieving.

Even desired changes involve a grief process. Grief cannot be rushed, but it does not have to be debilitating. You have not only lost the relationship/person that you had, but, perhaps even more importantly, you are grieving the loss of the dream you had for your life, marriage, and family. Build time and space for grief work into your self-care practices.

5. Ritualize the transitions you are experiencing.

Rituals are intentional, repeated practices such as lighting candles, affirmations, prayers, chants and songs, visualizations, or any other activity that is meaningful to you. Rituals can be adopted, adapted, or totally original.

These actions become invested with meaning because they are deliberate, and because of their association with a time, event, or emotional state. Rituals are emotionally powerful.

They make the abstract concrete, and help give meaning to your experience. Small rituals around acknowledging the changes and releasing the dreams and the pain can take very little time, but be extremely healing and sustaining.

An excellent resource is, "Good Grief Rituals: Tools for Healing," by Elaine Childs-Gowell.

6. Hold a vision of where you are going.

Clarify the path you want to be on, and acknowledge your steps in the direction of your desired life. Reward yourself for even small successes.

7. Maintain and build your integrity.

Clarify your values and needs. Carefully identify the areas of your life where you are out of integrity -- not honoring your own needs and not living according to your values -- and make changes daily to bring yourself into integrity. You are not defined by your past. Each day presents an opportunity to be the person you want to be.

8. Claim your space.

This doesn't mean purging your environment of every trace of your ex. Particularly if you have children, be sensitive to their need for consistency and stability in the face of all of the changes.

But do give some thought to what kind of environment truly reflects your tastes, your priorities, your interests, and make changes that feel empowering and validating to you.

9. Claim your identity, both for yourself as an individual, and for your family as a complete whole.

It is common to feel as though you are walking around with parts of yourself missing, particularly if you have been partnered for a long time. Holidays can be an especially difficult time for this.

Look at the assumptions you are making and the cultural and family messages you have internalized, and redefine your own paradigm of what is a family and what is a person.

Make the new paradigm concrete: take a family portrait of yourself and the kids, send out your holiday letter and sign it "The Johnson Family" (with your own name, of course!), maintain/adapt old family traditions and create new ones.

10. Stay present with the process.

Resist the temptation to self-medicate with television, alcohol, or other escapes. This is an opportunity for growth and self-development that, although you would never have chosen it, you will come to value immensely if you use it well.

Copyright 2000-2003 CoachVille, LLC.

This piece was written by Peggy Neill, BS Ed, MLA, who can be reached at peggy@sunrisecoaching.com, or visited on the web at Sunrise Coaching.

Are you looking for more information on Relationships, Cooperation, Teamwork, Diplomacy, Negotiation, and Cultural Issues?

Libra is the astrology sign that deals specifically with Relationships, Cooperation, Teamwork, Diplomacy, Negotiation, and Cultural Issues. Learn more about Libra.
The information here tells all about Libra Astrology.

Libra Horoscope

Only in growth, reform, and change, paradoxically enough, is true security to be found.
~ Anne Morrow Lindbergh ~
Born June 22, 1906

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Last updated November 8th, 2004

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Astrology is for Believers.

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The Dark Night of the Soul : A Psychiatrist Explores the Connection Between Darkness and Spiritual Growth
By
Gerald G. May