Planets in Retrograde -- The Basics
By
Rebecca Brents
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When I have visited some of these 'type' of sites (yours is 'most unique,' and I do not bunch it together with the others:):) I had never gotten the one-on-one interaction like I do here...most are not 'personal' and do not have the 'human touch' as you and your staff give it.
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Just How Bad IS That Person You Work For?
Part 1
by Susan Dunn
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Since I work in Emotional Intelligence, I get emails about some pretty awful managers (as well as colleagues, subordinates and peers). Work takes up a lot of our life, and misery at work is chronically stressful. The questions often amount to, "Can I 'fix' this if I learn more Emotional Intelligence?"
The answer is "yes," but probably not in the way you're thinking. Can you make a nasty person nice by using your EQ skills, such as empathy? You might be able to make the situation better, but it's a big "it depends." Here's what it depends upon.
As has been said, 'a problem you can fix; a fact you just have to live with," and you have to know what you're looking at. Can you ever control someone else and make them the way you want them to be? No. Can you change them? Sometimes, if they have the desire to get along. Can you change your viewpoint? Always.
Now how do you tell what personality you can work with, and what you can't? Narcissistic rage. Get used to that term; you're going to be hearing it more. It's known as "the famous narcissistic rage." You know it if you've had it coming at you. It's a blind, ugly, mindless and virulent kind of rage; an attack.
Now, consider a fairly typical workplace scenario. Your manager is not of the highest EQ. The stress is building as a deadline approaches. Suddenly (s)he blows. Something someone did, or said sets them off, and they burst into a fit of rage. It could be yelling, or swearing, or throwing something, or walking out in a tantrum.
So the next step ... let's say you decide to try some of your EQ skills. Using your empathy, you realize the person was under added stress at the time. Still, you can't tolerate being called a fathead, or incompetent boob, or Captain F-up or whatever the insulting epithet was, and this has been the last straw in a bad working situation to begin with.
After some reflection, when you've calmed down and been able to think it over, you find a good time to go in and talk it out with the manager.
You bring up what happened. You say how it made you feel, request to be treated with more respect, say "let's let bygones be bygones but ." and generally try to talk it out.
Susan Dunn, MA, Clinical Psychology, The EQ CoachT, Susan Dunn. Susan is the author of "How to Live Your Life with Emotional Intelligence."
I offer coaching around emotional intelligence for career, relationships, resilience (the skill for this decade), transitions, retirement, and personal and professional development. I train managers and coaches to teach EQ.
Mailto: sdunn@susandunn.cc for FREE eZines.
For free daily tips on how to develop your EQ, send blank email to: EQ4U.
Are you looking for more information on Career, Professional Issues, Reputation, Organizational Leadership, Political Postures, Honor, Fame, and Prestige?
Capricorn is the astrology sign that deals specifically with Career, Professional Issues, Reputation, Organizational Leadership, Political Postures, Honor, Fame, and Prestige. Learn more about Capricorn.
The information here tells all about Capricorn Astrology.
Capricorn Horoscope
The true scientist never loses the faculty of amusement.
It is the essence of his being.
~ J. Robert Oppenheimer ~
Leader of the Manhattan Project, which developed the atomic bomb
Born April 22, 1904
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Last updated January 19th, 2005
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