Planets in Retrograde -- The Basics
By
Rebecca Brents
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I actually got energized as I wandered through the Enchanted Spirit site the other day. Good vibes seemed to dance off the screen.
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| Fear of Intimacy | In the Spotlight for Pisces Contents | Coping with Grief |
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Healthy Grief, Unhealthy Grief
Part 1
by Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
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We all know that it is in one's highest good to grieve the loss of a relationship. Healthy grief releases feelings rather than allowing them to get stuck in the body. Healthy grief allows the griever to heal the loss and move on with life.
Yet grief is not always healing. Many of us have known people who were stuck in their grief, seemingly locked into the past and unable to move forward in their lives.
What is the difference between those who feel their grief and move on and those who get stuck in it? The difference lies in what they believe they have lost. When people believe they have lost their source of love, their grief will feel unending.
Gary had been in a three-year relationship with Samantha when Samantha decided to end the relationship. Gary was devastated. In this relationship, like in his past relationships, Gary was a taker -- always trying to get love but unable to give love or share love. Samantha gave him a lot of love, but she often felt very lonely with him.
Gary was devastated when she left because his source of love was gone. He was not grieving the loss of Samantha as a person he loved. He was grieving the loss of her love for him. He was grieving as a lost wounded child rather than as a loving adult.
As a result, Gary became stuck in his grief. He was stuck in feeling like a victim -- stuck in "poor me." Gary had never done the inner work to develop an adult part of himself that could bring love to himself and share it with others. He felt lost, abandoned, and hurt.
No matter how much he cried, no healing occurred. Because he was abandoning himself, he just continued to feel alone and despairing. Sometimes he was angry at Samantha for abandoning him and other times he was angry at himself for not being a better partner.
He had many regrets that plagued him, and a constant inner refrain was, "If only I had......" "If only I had listened to her more, maybe she wouldn't have left." If only I had told her how beautiful she is, maybe she wouldn't have left."
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Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?", "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By My Kids?", "Healing Your Aloneness","Inner Bonding", and "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By God?" Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: Inner Bonding
or email: margaret@innerbonding.com
Are you looking for more information on Faith, Therapy, Healing, Self-Understanding, Psychological Issues, Self-Sabotage, Cosmic Consciousness, Artistic Inspiration, and Karma?
Pisces is the astrology sign that deals specifically with Faith, Therapy, Healing, Self-Understanding, Psychological Issues, Self-Sabotage, Cosmic Consciousness, Artistic Inspiration, and Karma. Learn more about Pisces.
The information here tells all about Pisces Astrology.
Pisces Horoscope
There are children playing in the street
who could solve some of my top problems in physics,
because they have modes of sensory perception that I lost long ago.
~ J. Robert Oppenheimer ~
Leader of the Manhattan Project, which developed the atomic bomb
Born April 22, 1904
Featured In the Spotlight Article: From the In the Spotlight Archives: In the Spotlight Articles for the Current Sign: |
| Fear of Intimacy | In the Spotlight for Pisces Contents | Coping with Grief |
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Last updated April 24th, 2005
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