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Sometimes getting the right answer means asking the right question.

Life is full of hints, signs, and advice ... if you know where to look and what you're looking for.

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Self Improvement for Astrology Sign Pisces

Healthy Grief, Unhealthy Grief
Part 1
by Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
Inner Bonding

Astrology, Tarot, and Self Improvement for the New Age.
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 Fear of Intimacy  In the Spotlight for Pisces Contents  Coping with Grief 

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Pisces

Thought for the Moment

Healthy Grief, Unhealthy Grief
Part 1
by Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

Page: 1 2

We all know that it is in one's highest good to grieve the loss of a relationship. Healthy grief releases feelings rather than allowing them to get stuck in the body. Healthy grief allows the griever to heal the loss and move on with life.

Yet grief is not always healing. Many of us have known people who were stuck in their grief, seemingly locked into the past and unable to move forward in their lives.

What is the difference between those who feel their grief and move on and those who get stuck in it? The difference lies in what they believe they have lost. When people believe they have lost their source of love, their grief will feel unending.

Gary had been in a three-year relationship with Samantha when Samantha decided to end the relationship. Gary was devastated. In this relationship, like in his past relationships, Gary was a taker -- always trying to get love but unable to give love or share love. Samantha gave him a lot of love, but she often felt very lonely with him.

Gary was devastated when she left because his source of love was gone. He was not grieving the loss of Samantha as a person he loved. He was grieving the loss of her love for him. He was grieving as a lost wounded child rather than as a loving adult.

As a result, Gary became stuck in his grief. He was stuck in feeling like a victim -- stuck in "poor me." Gary had never done the inner work to develop an adult part of himself that could bring love to himself and share it with others. He felt lost, abandoned, and hurt.

No matter how much he cried, no healing occurred. Because he was abandoning himself, he just continued to feel alone and despairing. Sometimes he was angry at Samantha for abandoning him and other times he was angry at himself for not being a better partner.

He had many regrets that plagued him, and a constant inner refrain was, "If only I had......" "If only I had listened to her more, maybe she wouldn't have left." If only I had told her how beautiful she is, maybe she wouldn't have left."

Page: 1 2

Margaret PaulMargaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?", "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By My Kids?", "Healing Your Aloneness","Inner Bonding", and "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By God?" Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: Inner Bonding
or email: margaret@innerbonding.com

Are you looking for more information on Faith, Therapy, Healing, Self-Understanding, Psychological Issues, Self-Sabotage, Cosmic Consciousness, Artistic Inspiration, and Karma?

Pisces is the astrology sign that deals specifically with Faith, Therapy, Healing, Self-Understanding, Psychological Issues, Self-Sabotage, Cosmic Consciousness, Artistic Inspiration, and Karma. Learn more about Pisces.
The information here tells all about Pisces Astrology.

Pisces Horoscope

I am impelled, not to squeak like a grateful and apologetic mouse, but to roar like a lion out of pride in my profession.
~ John Steinbeck ~
Born February 27, 1902

Featured In the Spotlight Article:
How To Turn A Crisis into A Challenge
When a crisis hits - the end of a marriage, the loss of a job, or the death of a loved one - it throws you into a complete tailspin. Suddenly your world is no longer safe and secure. What can you do to pick up the pieces and take the first steps toward living a full life again?

From the In the Spotlight Archives:
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 Fear of Intimacy  In the Spotlight for Pisces Contents  Coping with Grief 

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