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Are You Controlling or Loving Yourself? Part 1 by Margaret Paul, Ph.D. Inner Bonding |
| Astrology, Tarot, and Self Improvement for the New Age. |
Astrology Tarot New Age (Home) / Self Improvement

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Are You a Writer? A Musician? A Photographer? An Artist? Are you seeking a more meaningful, more focused creative dimension to life? Nourish your Inner Artist with our new creativity class. Answering Creativity's Call presents an hour and a half of lessons and lectures, packed with inspiration, information, strategies and support to help you be the creator you want to be and live the creative life you want to have. Learn more here: Creativity Class

Are You Controlling or Loving Yourself? Part 1 by Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
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How often do you hear a parental voice in your head that says things like, "You've got to lose weight," or "You should get up earlier every morning and exercise," or "Today I should get caught up on the bills," or "I've got to get rid of this clutter." Let's explore what happens in response to this voice.
We have a very good reason for judging ourselves: the judgmental part of us believes that by judging, criticizing, "shoulding" ourselves, we will motivate ourselves to take action and therefore protect against failure or rejection.
We may have been judging ourselves to get ourselves to do things "right" since we were kids, hoping to keep ourselves in line. And we keep on doing it because we believe it works.
Let's take the example of Karl, who is a high-powered executive in a large accounting firm. Karl has had a heart attack and is supposed to watch his diet. Right after his heart attack, he did well avoiding sugar, fats, and overeating, but after six months or so, he found himself struggling with his food plan.
In our counseling session, Karl told me he was upset with himself for having a big desert as well as a big meal the night before. I asked Karl to put himself back into the situation and recreate what he had been feeling.
"Well, I was out to dinner with one of our biggest clients. He asked me a question and I didn't remember the facts, so I couldn't answer him. As soon as this happened, that voice came into my head telling me that I'm stupid, that I should have remembered it and 'What's the matter with me anyway?'"
"What did you feel as soon as you judged yourself?" I asked.
"Well, looking back, I think I felt that sad, sort of dark empty hollow feeling I often get inside. And you know what - that's when I started to eat a lot of bread with tons of butter and ordered the desert! I didn't realize it was in response to that empty feeling that I hate!"
"So the sad empty feeling is what you feel when you judge yourself. Judging yourself is an inner abandonment, so your Inner Child then feels alone, sad and empty. You are telling your Child that he is not good enough. I know that you don't do this with your actual children, but you do it a lot with yourself, don't you?"
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Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?", "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By My Kids?", "Healing Your Aloneness","Inner Bonding", and "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By God?" Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: Inner Bonding or email: margaret@innerbonding.com

Are you looking for more information on Self-Promotion, Self-Confidence, Creativity, Leadership, Leisure, and Romance?
Leo is the astrology sign that deals specifically with Self-Promotion, Self-Confidence, Creativity, Leadership, Leisure, and Romance. Learn more about Leo.
The information here tells all about Leo Astrology.
Leo Horoscope

Choose your friends carefully. Your enemies will choose you. ~ Yasser Arafat ~ Born August 24, 1929
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Simple Steps to Rid Your Home of Dust Mite Allergies
Eight-Legged creatures infest your blankets, pillows, couches, chairs, carpeting and more. They are only half a millimeter big yet a still living, eating and defecating in your house. They trigger allergy symptoms and feed on your dead skin. What am I talking about? Dust Mites. Many people are unaware that there are millions of dust mites in their house and know little to nothing regarding the eradication of dust mites. |
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Enchanted Spirit is a non-denominational spiritual center of healing, support, self-improvement, personal guidance, education and writing. We publish multi-media works of New Age thought and information to encourage serenity and growth in individual life choices, advance the universal search for life's meaning, and promote tolerance for positive ideas from all philosophies and religious traditions, believing as we do that truth is where you find it. |
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