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	Four Steps to Direct Communication Part 2 by Julie Fuimano Nurturing Your Success
Astrology, Tarot, and Self Improvement for the New Age.

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Four Steps to Direct Communication
Part 2
by Julie Fuimano

Page: 1 2

1.) Identify what you want. This is a big obstacle to successful relationships and productive employees. If you don't know what you want, how can you expect others to know? Stop and consider what it is you want from this person, or what needs to be done. Envision the outcome you seek. The clearer you are about your vision for success, the easier it will be to share it with others.

2.) Make no assumptions. People are not mind-readers. They do not know what is going on inside your head! Once you know how you want things to be, don't assume that other people know what you're thinking or that they think the same way you do about how things should be. They have their own ideas and opinions and priorities. What's a priority for you may not even be on their radar. Don't assume anything; validate any assumptions you may have by asking questions to make sure all involved parties are on the same page.

3.) Ask for what you need. Be clear and specific in your request. Don't make excuses and don't beg. Many times, people are intimidated or fearful of asking for what they want. Fear can be an obstacle to success. You have to rise above your fear and muster your courage to achieve what you want. You have every right to ask for what you need. You have no control over people's response to your request. You can only be responsible for speaking your truth in a way that can be heard.

4) When asking for what you need, eliminate the emotional energy and simply make a direct request. This means your voice should carry no emotional energy. The inability to manage emotions is a huge obstacle for most people because they simply weren't taught the skills to deal with them. You must handle your emotions separately from making your request. If you are emotional, the person is less likely to hear you or may become defensive or emotional themselves.

Suzanne's resentment could have cued her in to the fact that there was something she wasn't doing to honor herself. Resentment is usually anger at self. By learning to follow these four steps, Suzanne started to experience a closer relationship with her husband. He began to look for ways to help out and their communication improved as they started to talk more about other important subjects.

Beth also experienced improvements at work. Some people initially pushed back when she started making direct requests regarding their behaviors. Some of her staff, one in particular, is now on an action plan to improve her productivity. It may be effective; it may not, but whatever the result, the impact will be a positive one for the department. Most of her staff is grateful for the direction. People like direction and consistency. They want to know what is expected of them and to be corrected when it's necessary (in a way that's appropriate, of course.) People want to do a good job.

They want to be great spouses and great employees. Most of the time people really just don't know how to be different. It's your job to teach them by communicating directly - identify what you want, don't assume others think the same way as you or that they know what you're thinking, speak your truth simply and clearly, and do so without any emotional charge. People are more productive, happier, and experience deeper, healthier and more meaningful relationships when each party is willing and able to speak their truth directly. As you become more adept at it, you may need to teach others how to speak their truth as well. Don't assume they know how.

(c) 2007 Julie Fuimano, All rights reserved.

Page: 1 2

Author's URL
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Do you want to be a more effective communicator? Are you seeking to manage your time more effectively and work smarter so you have less stress and more time for yourself? Want to manage your emotions confidently and experience less conflict? Or are you looking to create a productive team? Then contact us today at (610) 277-2726 to see how coaching would support you in achieving the results you want.

Julie Fuimano, MBA, BSN, RN is a Success Coach and author of "The Journey Called YOU: A Roadmap to Self-Discovery and Acceptance," the manual for unleashing the power of you. Sign up for our e-newsletter or purchase your copy of the book at Nurturing Your Success or write to Julie@nurturingyoursuccess.com. "Be Great. Be YOU."

Are you looking for more information on Ideas, Communication, Intellectual Development, and Mobility?

Gemini is the astrology sign that deals specifically with Ideas, Communication, Intellectual Development, and Mobility. Learn more about Gemini.
The information here tells all about Gemini Astrology.

Gemini Horoscope

For a nation which has an almost evil reputation for bustle, bustle, bustle, and rush, rush, rush, we spend an enormous amount of time standing around in line in front of windows, just waiting.
~ Robert Benchley ~
Born September 15, 1889

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Last updated August 12th, 2007

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