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	Things To Know Or Consider Regarding 'Feelings' by Dennis R. Tesdell
Astrology, Tarot, and Self Improvement for the New Age.

Things To Know Or Consider Regarding 'Feelings'
by Dennis R. Tesdell

Everyone has many feelings daily. These feelings help determine our moods, what we will do, and decisions we will make. It is important to realize how powerful feelings are, and also some of the myths and misconceptions we have heard or may have about them.

1. There Are A Few *Basic Feelings* But MANY Variations.

To make it simple, the most common and basic feelings are sad, glad, mad, and scared. All but glad come from a basic bigger feeling of *fear* and are based on beliefs we developed from *past* experiences or teachings. Feeling glad comes from the basic feeling of *love* and is *present* oriented. The other feelings are real, and they can be changed to a more positive feeling or have a less negative effect on us if we change our patterns of thinking and processing events and thoughts and beliefs.

2. Feelings Are Neither *Right* Nor *Wrong*.

Feelings are very personal and individual. Each person has the right to feel whatever they wish. We may disagree or experience a different feeling, and that does not make the other person's feeling *wrong.* Placing a *right* or *wrong* on feelings puts judgments on them which is not anyone's job to do.

3. We Cannot *Make* Other People Have Certain Feelings.

While what we do and say might *help* or *lead* a person to feeling a certain way, it is ultimately their decision to take what we say or do or how we act, and decide how they will feel. We are not responsible for how others feel, besides taking some responsibility over how we treat others. We know if we are treating someone well and considerately, or poorly, and with malice or disrespect, etc.

4. Feelings Do Not Need To Control Our Behavior.

Granted, when a person feels angry, he or she might have the desire to curse, hit someone or something, throw something, or yell. But those are just a few of *many* of the options open to them as far as their behavior is concerned.

If we feel angry and decide to laugh it off or to accept it as natural for hitting our thumb with a hammer, we can then decide whether to act in a calm (although it does hurt of course) manner, or to throw the hammer, yell at the hammer (when in fact it was our hand that was controlling it) kick the cat, etc. We are always *at choice* for how we translate feelings into behavior. It's healthy to not hold feelings in, and we have *many* ways of expressing the feelings from which to choose.

5. Feelings Are Good *Barometers* Of Other Things Going On In Our Life.

Unless we are really into fooling ourselves and others, how we feel is generally a good indicator of how we feel we are doing in the world at the time. We can be having a *bad day* and choose not to let it affect those around us or get us down. When we are doing what we love to do and treating ourself and others in a loving and considerate manner, chances are good we will have feelings that correspond to that.

If we are hurting others, cheating on our spouse, or yelling at our children, chances are we will more often feel the *negative* types of feelings such as anger, frustration, self-doubt, guilt, etc. We may even experience physical ills when our feelings are not of the *positive* variety. The mind and body go *hand-in-hand.*

6. All Feelings Can Be Motivators If We Choose Them To Be.

If we examine our feelings, they can help us in many ways to change behaviors or to protect us. Anger can motivate us to work on solving a long-standing problem. When we are fed up enough, we can make changes using the energy from our anger. Repeated sadness and hurt feelings can wake us up to patterns we have in our personal or business relationships that have set us up to be hurt over and over again.

Feelings are linked to our emotions which are linked to our inner knowledge called our *intuition*. Tapping into and getting in touch with our true inner desires and needs can change our lives and turn anger to positive action or fear to letting go of something from the past and starting to live fully *in the present*!

7. Feelings Are **Energy**.

Because feelings come from what we think and how we think, they are charged with much energy. The more powerful the feelings, the stronger the energy. People who are able to lift a car off a loved one in an accident have tremendous strength, due to the power they are able to create based on their strong feelings to save their loved one. If one can harness the positive energy from positive feelings, they will be able to do virtually anything they want with their life.

8. We Create Our Own Feelings.

Just as we are not responsible for other people's feelings, we *are* totally responsible for our own feelings. It is always our choice and our decision to take a situation or a thought and create sadness, happiness, anger, resentment, envy, joy, or love out of it. The longer we think before quickly *reacting* to a thought or a situation and creating a feeling, the better our chances of making the best choice for all concerned. As Mark Twain said, "When angry, count to ten. When very angry, count to ten again."

9. Our Thoughts Correlate Directly With How We Feel.

As mentioned, we have the power to decide to feel however we wish at any given time. It takes practice developing the skill of pausing before we immediately leap to a *knee jerk* feeling, but it can be done certainly. There are many sayings such as "As you think, so you will be," etc.

They all mean basically the same thing. We can come from an emotional attitude of fear or negativity, in which case the *spin* we put on everyone and everything that happens will probably result in a feeling that is negative or uncomfortable. We can also come from a neutral, peaceful, or loving place, in which case we will be in a good place to create or *interpret* what was said or done or seen, with a positive feeling, even if we don't personally think it is for us, or was a kind thing to say or do, etc.

Forgiving ourselves for what we say and do that is not loving nor kind to others and doing the same to other people is a *major* step in getting to the place where regardless of what might happen in our life, we can accept it without quick anger, judgments, or actions. It may sound "Pollyanna-ish," but it leads the people who live that way to happier and more productive lives.

10. Feelings Need To Be Dealt With And Acknowledged.

Feelings will not just go away if we ignore them. They are a perfect example of the *snowball effect*. If we do not deal with them by talking, or writing, or some other manner, they will grow bigger and more intense. What was once a small feeling of resentment can turn into a large feeling of hatred. What was once a small hurt can turn into isolation or vengence feelings or behaviors.

If we cannot deal with the feeling on our own, the next best thing is to talk to a best friend, a pastor, a counselor, or anyone we trust who will listen. Sometimes, the best way is to talk it out with the person or persons around which we have developed the feelings. It is not easy, but unless it is done, it saps a person's energy, causes personal and business problems, and worst of all, deteriorates the quality of the person's life, due to all of the constant negative energy.

Feelings can ruin a life, or they help create a life that is full of prosperity, abundance, peace, good health, and love.

(c) 1997 Dennis R. Tesdell and Top Ten, All rights reserved.

Note: This author's website is closed.

Go to: Self-Improvement for Cancer, Working with Emotions

Are you looking for more information on Home, Family, Emotional Security, and Feelings?

Cancer is the astrology sign that deals specifically with Home, Family, Emotional Security, and Feelings. Learn more about Cancer.
The information here tells all about Cancer Astrology.

Cancer Horoscope

I am impelled, not to squeak like a grateful and apologetic mouse, but to roar like a lion out of pride in my profession.
~ John Steinbeck ~
Born February 27, 1902

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Last updated March 29th, 2009

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