Planets in Retrograde -- The Basics
By
Rebecca Brents

Astrology Coaching
Live Your Life by Divine Design

Astrology Coaching puts YOU in control of the life you were born to live!!

Take a journey through your birth chart as never before.

Real Astrology ...
for people who take
their lives seriously.

Enroll in
Astrology Coaching
TODAY!!

Cut through the confusion.

See clearly

Think better

Make informed choices

Discover why the Tarot has intrigued, informed, and interested spiritual seekers for centuries.

What is your life''s biggest question?

Get a reading on Your Situation

Join our
Astrology and Tarot
Premium Membership
TODAY!!

Recommended Book from Amazon

Loving the Self-Absorbed: How to Create a More Satisfying Relationship with a Narcissistic Partner
By
Nina W. Brown

Astrology is for Believers.

With an open mind and a knowledge of Astrology you can watch your life unfold in ways that make sense.

You can understand the demands of change and "what's really going on" in a crisis.

Whether in a gentle push in the right direction or in a "hard knock upside the head," you can read the message behind what life is asking of you.

Real Astrology ...
for people who take
their lives seriously.

Join our
Astrology and Tarot
Premium Membership
TODAY!!

	The Tyranny of the Good Girl, the Good Boy Part 1 by Margaret Paul, Ph.D. Inner Bonding
Astrology, Tarot, and Self Improvement for the New Age.

    Email This Page to a Friend    

The Tyranny of the Good Girl, the Good Boy
Part 1
by Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

Page: 1 2

Many of us grew up in households where our profound needs for love and safety were not met. We did not feel safe and loved in the face of disapproval, criticism, rejection, abandonment, smothering, engulfment, physical abuse, sexual abuse. We did not feel safe when there was yelling, fighting, violence, substance abuse.

We had to do something to feel safe. Some of us figured out that we could have some control over our parents' or other caregivers' behavior if we were really good, if we attempted to do everything right.

We figured out that if we disconnected from ourselves, from our own feelings and stayed acutely tuned into the feelings of those around us, we could have some control over getting some approval and avoiding what we feared. We learned to feel a degree of safety by being a good girl, a good boy.

The problem is that, while we may have had some success with this strategy in our childhood homes, this same strategy is now causing our problems in our relationships at work and at home.

When we disconnect from our own feelings, we become invisible to ourselves. Others end up treating us the way we treat ourselves, so we become invisible to others as well. As adults, we end up bringing about the very rejection we are trying to avoid, because we are rejecting ourselves.

My client, Maria, gave me the title of this article when she said, "I'm trapped in the tyranny of having to be a good girl." Maria is struggling with her relationship with her boss, Andrea.

Maria works as a trainer and is excellent at what she does. Like so many people who learned to control others through being good, Maria is a high achiever. She has also been very compliant with Andrea, changing plans and scurrying around to fulfill Andrea's demands and expectations.

However, she frequently ends up feeling stepped on and used by Andrea, as well as unseen and unappreciated. She has had the same problem with the men in her life, having given and given to the point of exhaustion while not receiving the love and acceptance she always hopes for.

As long as Maria is tuned into to Andrea's needs and feelings and not aware of her own, she will continue to be invisible to Andrea and others.

Page: 1 2

Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?", "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By My Kids?", "Healing Your Aloneness","Inner Bonding", and "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By God?" Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: Inner Bonding
or email: margaret@innerbonding.com

Are you looking for more information on Self-Promotion, Self-Confidence, Creativity, Leadership, Leisure, and Romance?

Leo is the astrology sign that deals specifically with Self-Promotion, Self-Confidence, Creativity, Leadership, Leisure, and Romance. Learn more about Leo.
The information here tells all about Leo Astrology.

Leo Horoscope

A man is in general better pleased when he has a good dinner upon his table, than when his wife talks Greek.
~ Samuel Johnson ~
Born September 18, 1709

Please click on the titles to visit these fine areas of Enchanted Spirit

---

	PO Box 1080 Sandia Park · NM · 87047

Enchanted Spirit is a non-denominational spiritual center of healing, support, self-improvement, personal guidance, education and writing. We publish multi-media works of New Age thought and information to encourage serenity and growth in individual life choices, advance the universal search for life's meaning, and promote tolerance for positive ideas from all philosophies and religious traditions, believing as we do that truth is where you find it.

---

This site is hosted and maintained for Enchanted Spirit by

Catweasel Ink

Copyright © 1999 - 2008 by Enchanted Spirit and Catweasel Ink.
Contributed works copyright by their respective authors. All rights reserved.
Unauthorized reproduction specifically prohibited.

Last updated May 10th, 2004

Rebecca is not available
right now.


Please check back
later
CLICK HERE FOR
MORE INFO

Real People
Real Lives
Real Ambitions
Real Questions

Our Premium Members
Get
Real Answers
Real Direction
Real Information
Real Advantages

Become a
Premium Member
today!!

Astrology Coaching
Live Your Life by Divine Design

Learn in detail about your character, the way you were built to operate, the life you were meant to live, how you were designed to support yourself with money, in relationships, and with work that honors the unique spirit you are.

Is This Your Year of Living Prosperously?

Take a journey through your birth chart as never before.

Real Astrology ...
for people who take
their lives seriously.

Enroll in
Astrology Coaching
TODAY!!

Fast Feng Shui: 9 Simple Principles for Transforming Your Life by Energizing Your Home
By
Stephanie Roberts